True Beauty

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I’m sitting here, just had the most wonderful day, everything was so perfect.

Had my sister, my mother and my nephew, and that is the three people I care most about. If everything I have was taken from me, and they are all I have left, it would be all I want.

There are so many people, out there, that have absolutely everything they could ask for and so much more, but they don’t seem satisfied. . . maybe satisfied isn’t the correct word to use? I think all that is missing is their happiness. Happiness doesn’t come from material things, it doesn’t come with money or from money, nor does it come from getting everything we’ve ever wanted.

There are so many days and times in our lives where we really do pray and wish for something, but when we finally get it, it doesn’t seem to have the effect, on us, that we had expected. I don’t think that it has anything to do with the value or worth of the actual goal, or that it has, in any way, lost its appeal…I think that at the point in our lives, we thought it was what we needed to be happy. When we get what we’ve waited for, most times, we have found something else that we believe we want, but we keep chasing after an even newer happiness, and sometimes it seems like an everlasting chase.

I think if we really stop and think about all the things we have, not comparing to what othersdon’t have just to see the appreciation in that, but to really count our blessings, we’d be so surprised with the greatness of it. I mean I get that there are so many people who go through difficulties and hardships and when they see us smiling they think that we have it so great, when they have never actually walked a day in our shoes. We have sadness in our hearts, but choose not to wear it on our sleeves, because why should we? The more people know, the harder things could become.

Who are we to say that our difficulty is greater or even lesser than the next persons? We have all loved and lost; we have all witnessed illness or, at the very least, heard of somebody that we knew or loved that has died. Death is part of life, yet people try every little thing to stop it, or slow it down. I don’t understand why though…

Ok I know that when we’re young we may be at our prime, we may have beautiful skin, bodies and all that comes with it, but as time goes on beauty may fade, and memories would be lost but there is such beauty in that, I mean I cant say I want to live until a hundred and all that I am now is but a memory, that I can hardly remember, but how many people even get to see 25 these days!

I’ve learnt that complaining about what isn’t going our way is not going to change our situations and make it all go how we hope for it to go, if anything, it would make it worse. If we tried our best to stay positive and really try to keep our heads above water while our lives changed around us, it’s that much better than going down without so much as a fight. I get these negative people in my life that seems to want to pull me down, all the time, probably so they are not alone at the bottom, but I refuse to be dragged down to the dirt!

It’s actually kinda funny how insecurities of other people have such a huge impact on howwe feel about ourselves. If somebody is confident and satisfied with themselves, we don’t doubt our own perfections, but if they are self-conscious and dissatisfied in themselves, they seem to focus on and also point out our imperfections! We all know that in most cases, the mean things people say, or the things we say, roots from jealousy or our own insecurities, but it’s hard to turn the switch off and be satisfied with what we have or to see the beauty in ourselves.

When I was younger people would always say I was chubby and I became so self-conscience, to say the least, I tried every diet and exercise plan, and to this day I would triple check if I don’t look ‘chubby’ in a new dress I have just bought. I look back at the photos from the times where I was at an all-time low… and I can honestly say, now, I was crazy and down-right-stupid to believe what people said. . . what girls said! I mean guys always told me I was hott and I thought they were just being nice or just saying so to make me feel better. I was the younger sister, with a move curvy figure, and my sister has always been very athletic and slender, so people would always ask why am I so ‘big’, I’m supposed to ‘look’ younger! All that nabs and swords certainly hurt, and even though they don’t see the harm in saying those things, let me just say, it’s something that has stuck with me until now. Even with my personal trainer and super healthy lifestyle I still have my insecurities.

People remember the hurtful things, not the compliments others give. People really need to learn to accept that there are going to be better people than them! The sooner people realize that they will not always be the most beautiful or smartest person to have existed; the better it will be for everyone.

In all honesty, I was lucky, because I got to the realization that I wasn’t what people said I was, early enough to find my happiness and satisfaction. What about all those other people that doesn’t see that yet? There is so much undeserved negativity affecting so many, if not everybody, and all they need is to really sit, and think about whether the things that people are saying is actually even true. We should all ask ourselves if what people say is worth the pain we allow ourselves to feel through other people insecurities. In most cases, what they say is not even true! They have created this fiction to make themselves feel better!

On the other hand, if it is true, at least that person kinda helped us realize, that which we refused to confront before. And in a weird way they have given us the push to change it! Now change is a weird thing, all on its own.

I don’t believe in changing our outer appearances. The saying goes “nobody is perfect” when in fact I believe that “EVERYONE is perfect” but we are looking through imperfect eyes! Imperfect because the eyes we are looking though is brain-washed and set to compare each person’s beauty to another, but how does one compare the moon and the sun, when they are both so different, so perfect, so beautiful?

People are going ‘under-the-knife’ to be “perfect” and look like one kind of perfect, and when the fashion trend changes, that ‘perfect’ won’t be good enough anymore! Yet more and more people are doing it and starting at earlier ages. I mean if it isn’t broken, why ‘fix’ it?!

Sometimes the things we want to change is so much better than what we want it to be, and sometimes we realize in time, to stop, and other times…too late, and there is no turning back.

I wish that people can really see the beauty in themselves and stop trying to be a photocopy of somebody else. Ageing is such a beautiful thing, we have been given the chance to live and experience so much but it’s like we are trying to erase and hide all the ‘evidence’. Each grey hair, each wrinkle, each so-called imperfection, marks a stage in our lives that we have reached and achieved where so many people have not been given the opportunity to experience. That should be enough to see the beauty in ageing, but some really don’t see it like that. It’s actually pretty sad, because they change so much and in the end they would have looked so much better having nothing ‘corrected’. Changing the outer shells of ourselves doesn’t make us better people, or more attractive people….true beauty comes from within! True beauty comes from the heart!

Now apart from our outer shells, we can choose to change that which we are able to change. Change is only necessary when the change is good for us. We all have our faults, but not all of us believe that our faults are bad enough to ‘want’ to change them. Change, no doubt, is hard to achieve…but when we complete that change, and achieve that goal, no words can explain the joy and happiness you feel thereafter. We may not be able to change the world, but we can definitely change our view of the world. We can change the way that we look at the world!

Change doesn’t happen overnight, unless we want it to. Sometimes when we feel so strongly about something we should act on it because that is when it lasts! I have come across so many moments in my life where I knew exactly what the right thing to do was, but I wasn’t ready to stop yet, sometimes we need to do the stupid things, in order to move forward. People think that by doing really dumb stuff, like drugs, shows that they’ve lived their lives, but what is the point on ‘wasting’ your life away, knowingly! I’d rather try to do something correct, and fail several times, than do something I know is so wrong, just for the experience! It doesn’t get you anywhere, it doesn’t shape the life you want, in a good way, and it really doesn’t have a positive impact on our lives! Most people think and believe that if we don’t do the things ‘everybody else does’ it makes us boring…but how boring is it to follow everyone in what they’re doing when you can be amazing and unique all on your own!

So when everyone was drinking, taking drugs and in the clubs, falling over themselves and forgetting everything they’ve done the night before, I was sitting here writing this, hoping to make a difference in at least one person’s life. If nobody gets to read this, at least I brought myself to believe in my own morals and to feel better about my own world! That for me is enough!